Monday, April 16, 2007

Gyan unlimited

So looks like i am back to my blogging habit. Feel like blogging whenever I have time. The feedback hasn’t been great though. Some of them have complained my posts have become too much nonsense and have begun calling it an all-fart-no-shit-blog. So here I am to ensure there’s more shit from now on and i hope you won't call it “Shitty” then.

Back to business. It’s my last month at DA-IICT. These four years have been heavenly. Absolute bliss. I should tell you I’ll miss all the Jeep rides here in Gandhinagar. The private transport works quite effectively here . You have jeeps designed to carry 12 people and which will depart as soon as 18 people have boarded. The gear-seat is the most exciting and one may pay an extra two rupees for it. Gear-seat is where you sit beside the driver with your legs on either side of the gear handle . Every time the driver changes gear all you can do is close your eyes and hope; like Bobli puts it; " the singular doesn’t hit the plural”. It used to be great fun and I’ll miss it. Miss you and your jeep, taxi bhaiyya .

Like I told you the only three things that have been kept me busy all this semester are Cricket, Football and instant messaging. Football is getting exciting these days with Chelsea not making it easy for us United fans and add to that all the exciting spot-the-ball contests on ESPN-STAR. I have been trying to formulate an algorithm to spot the ball, applicable universally to all the pictures, all the sports and I am happy to tell you , I have cracked it. And as my blog readers you will be the first few to know it and you can proudly tell your grandchildren that you were among the first ones to learn the STB (Spot the Ball) algorithm. Over to the algorithm now.

Step 1: Look at the picture
Step 2: See who’s the player
Step 3: Now comprehend the grid. For example .B-2 is the top left square of the grid.
Step 4: Look closely at the player
Step 5: Now more closely
Step 6 :If you find the ball ,continue to next step ,else goto Step 4
Step 7: Verify if it’s the player’s middle. Ya exactly, in our example it must be G-8.
Step 8: Go do a celebration run

So there you have, the invaluable algorithm. Next time you just have to spot “them” and you can a win a free trip to Rome.

Our next "Gyan" topic is instant messaging. After the birth of the SMS lingo and then the IM lingo we now have the LOL lingo often used by girls while chatting. If you haven’t heard of anything like this then you are not alone. Let me explain.The LOL language has only one word . Yes, the single word “LOL”. People convey everything with just this one word. There’s one girl whom I chat with who speaks this language. It works like this.

LOL (Hi)
LOL (Laugh Out Loud)
LOL (I am doin gud)
LOL (Shut up you sexual pervert)
LOL (All male bastards are like that)
LOL (Now stop bugging me. Get lost you arse)
LOL (K then . I’m leaving. Please don’t buzz me ever again)

So without ever saying anything they do convey many things. Now you know what excessive usage of LOL means. Oye!!! The LOL- girl is online. Have to buzz her. All’s fair as long she looks good. No? So, I have to leave but before I do; don’t miss me winning some big bucks on CNBC-TV18 on Saturday (21.4.07) 6:00 PM and the repeat telecast the next day (22.4.07) 5:30 PM. Bye then. :)